I was recently asked why I always look at the worse case scenario, My daughter asked me that question on a recent visit. We had sat watching her young son swim, and I had gazed over to the adult pool which was empty at that point in time. I saw ripples in the water and asked what it was. She told me that it was a result of the pump which was circulating water. I said that I hoped that it wasn't anyone in trouble...and that is when she asked me why...why do I think the worst?
That question has lingered since I was asked it. Why do I? Perhaps it is fear....Nobody wants to witness a sorrow, so I think I try to anticipate an impending incident before it happens. I have nursed for over 35 years. I have seen the very worst. I have heard the very worst. Many of the ill and dying that I cared for were the result of incidents that could have been prevented. If that doesn't inspire fear in your heart, nothing will.
So.. do I try to protect myself, and the ones I care about by alerting them to potential dangers? Perhaps.
Is fear, cynicism, and negativity a hereditary trait...or is it an environmentally acquired trait? Did I acquire this tendency at home, or is this a societal disease?
I don't believe that I am cynical... nor do I believe that I am negative. I believe that I am fearful. That is all.
I try to think the very best of others. I believe that people, for the most part, act with the very best of intention. (I know that my family members do... I hope that the strangers I encounter do too.) As a habit, I think the best of others until I am proven wrong. Not everyone does.
I have family members who are suspicious of every action or word. (They even are suspicious of the motives of their own family members.) The first response from their lips is one of negativity... but fear of motive, and suspicion is thankfully, not a trait I acquired. Why do I say that? Because their fears...their cynicism... and their negativity make others feel unhappy and nervous.
I don't know why I am the way I am...but what I do know is that when I express a fear without reason, I make others nervous and unhappy.
Chores! 1. Take out garbage... Check! 2. Let chickens out! ...Check! 3. Look at chickens!...Check! 4. Take pictures of chickens!....Check! 5. Clean kitchen.... 6. Look at chickens....Check! 7. Go shopping.... 8. Make dog biscuits..... 9. Look at chickens!....Check! 10, Repeat the above!
I brought my girls home from work last night. One of the maintenance staff at work kindly gave me two chickens, as his flock was becoming too large. We got them situated in their new digs where they spent an uneventful night. I, on the other hand, did not sleep well. I worried about foxes and weasels, coons and stray dogs all night long....
They survived their first night in the condo and seem to be settling in. These birds are about a year in age. They ran wild at their last abode. I am sure that they were treated well, because they look very healthy.
I am thrilled. Thank goodness for small pleasures!
I am not as great a blogger as some. I don't write often. I have other roles that need to be looked after first.
I work at a very stressful job...and getting through my work week intact, is my only focus most of the time. I am approaching the end of my career, and I want to make it to the finish on both feet.
When I became a nurse 39 years ago (OMG!) the rules were simple. You were expected to keep bedsides clean, give the right medication at the right time to the right person using the right route and the right dose. Residents were loved and treated with dignity. All in all, life was simple.
The rules have changed, folks. Residents now have rights. (AS IF they didn't back then!) They have the right to bathe if they wish...or not. They have the right to leave the building if they are deemed "capable". (If they are not yet deemed incapable, are an alcoholic, and choose go uptown, buy a bottle of whiskey and down it there, vomit on themselves, and cannot physically manoevre their way home or safely cross the railway tracks...well...they have the right to ask someone to call the staff to come and get them.) They have the right to strike out and curse at their caregivers. If they refuse to do as asked, they are immediately allowed to make this decision...whether in their best interest...or not.
Abuse? Not at our home. Staff are abused on a daily basis by some...both physically and verbally...but are you aware that if a staff member should "slip" and call a resident by an endearing term...such as "Honey" or "Sweetheart" without that resident's permission, that this is deemed abusive?
The Ministry and Police must be called if a resident...confused or not...makes contact with another resident. How would you like to be the family member who gets a call stating that mom has scratched another resident and that the Police have been called?
Injury inflicted on a nurse...bruise or breaks or cuts...are not reportable crimes.
This is only a small picture of what goes on when I go to work every day...and yes...retirement is looking mighty good. In the "mean" time, I puddle through, and spend a lot of time reading the following. It soothes my soul. Thanks Max.
Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may
be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all
persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to
the dull and the ignorant, they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive
persons, they are vexations to the spirit.
If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter; for
always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your
achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however
humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of
trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons
strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love, for in the
face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass.
Take kindly to the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the
things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child
of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be
here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding
as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and
whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep
peace in your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful
I love misty mornings on the river. Occasionally I get to see them! I would like to see more, but I need to overhaul my sleeping habits. I stay up too late, then read for an hour or so. No wonder I can't get up early.
My S.I.L. Jan, and her hubby, Keith, are in bed by nine pm, and up by 6 am. They start their mornings in the hot tub. What a way to start the day!!!!
I miss so much! My hubby reminds me of this. Below are pictures that he took one misty morning. He said that I am missing the best part of the day. I think his father taught him that...
There is NOTHING that excites me more than a visit with family! Yesterday was no exception! Dan, Tinah, and the girls came to see the Walleye spawn at the dam down the street from us. That is what they said, anyway. I know that what they really wanted a visit with Nana and Papa.
When they were about to leave they visited the horse that lives across the street. He even allowed them to pat him! His field mate would not, and just as well. I understand that the can land a wad of foul-smelling spit at quite a distance!
We are blessed to have seven grandchildren! Life has never been so busy! I continue to work as a nurse, but my home time is most important. I paint and craft, and enjoy life in our tiny 800 sq foot home. The challenge to downsize continues... Live simple and small is my mantra!