My personal belief is, that we are placed here...wherever "here" is ...to learn a lesson or two. I don't believe that bad things are sent to test us...however, I believe that we are tested on how we deal with life's curve balls. I believe that every encounter with joy and sorrow hides a lesson of some sort.
I have been fortunate to reach the autumn of my life. For me, it is a time of reflection. I think back over the years, and ask myself repeatedly, "Did I handle that right?" "What could I have done better?" What lesson was hidden in fabric of that encounter...disaster...relationship?
I believe that many times I did the best I could with the knowledge that I had. I believe that I am older now, and that I know better, and now do better. My friend has often said, "Old heads are not borne on young bodies." I thought of that statement many times when raising three children. I think of it now, as I reflect on the paths I have chosen, and the way I have handled relationships.
We have struggled over the past year carrying two mortgages. Would I make the choice that I did last summer to purchase this home in the quick manner that I did, if faced with the same decision? Yes! Yes! Yes! What have I learned? I have learned the value of a buck. I have learned patience. I have learned to be humble. I have also learned that if you have enough to get by, that there is always something to share.
There is another side to this coin, however. At times I ask myself if was foolish to want more. Perhaps I should have been happy with what I had..which is a lot more than others have. I certainly was comfortable, surrounded by my accumulations. That same question is what motivated me to look at a smaller home though. Living in a 2500 square foot home at this point in my life was comparable to driving a school bus, without passengers, to work every day.
I think that what I wanted was not more...but less.
So... I guess I will always mull over those questions..."Did I do it right? Did I get it right? What could I have done differently? Where and what was the lesson?"